Via Jezebel, a blood boiling, rage inducing, headache making, teeth grinding OMFG FFS ALREADY post.
So. Here’s a (necessarily heterosexist) reply to people who are struggling with the ethics of what right the father has in terms of decision making after conception– does he have the right to demand termination (no.) or that the woman carries to term (no.) or that he can get out of financial obligations to the baby (no.).
The hard truth is that pregnancy is the literal building of something– in this process, the father provides 50% of the blueprints only, while the woman provides the other 50% of the blueprints* AND constructs the building. In a business deal? The guy whose only stake was handing in half finished blueprints has no real say in whether the building is constructed or not, because he isn’t on the construction crew. But when he has supplied half of those blueprints, and the building is built, it’s half his building, to take care of, unless otherwise negotiated. That, unfortunately, is the reality of the situation.
Here is what the father/guy does have though– the right to NOT provide his half of the blueprints to someone who will do something he doesn’t want done with them. He has the right to talk to his partner and determine with his own good judgement whether she is someone that he believes he can trust not to do something he doesn’t want done with his blueprints. He has the right to say no to sex if he is not 100% comfortable with the potential outcomes. I believe he has the right to more birth control options than are currently available. I hope to see the RISUG option take off like wildfire in the US and be free to all men who want it, and I hope many men will want it. The best way to avoid pregnancy related issues is to avoid unplanned pregnancy.
But if the father/guy fails to talk to his partner before having sex, determine his own level of comfort with all of the possible outcomes, and make the choice which is HIS right, well. You don’t build it, you don’t have a say in the construction process. You don’t get to coerce anyone into building anything for you. You don’t get to complain about handing out your blueprints without exercising your rights first.
Your body is your body to use exactly how you see fit, and with full recognition of the responsibilities and rights that does and does not give you. Your rights end where mine begin. You know what trying to extend your rights to oppress others makes you? A fascist.
Know what happens to fascists? Billy Bragg can tell you:
* thanks to some internet commenter whose name I don’t now recall from a blog I can’t remember– I will not take credit for this wonderful analogy.